


anything / everything

by lovethevoid



Category: Waterparks (Band)
Genre: Alternate Universe - High School, Anal Fingering, Anal Sex, First Time, M/M, Making Out, Sexual Inexperience, there's no kink stuff it's just GUYS BEIN DUDES
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-05-18
Updated: 2019-05-18
Packaged: 2020-03-07 07:17:04
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,384
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18868387
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/lovethevoid/pseuds/lovethevoid
Summary: no one will ever love us the way that i do





	anything / everything

**Author's Note:**

> someone sent me an ask mentioning jawsten and then all i wanted was clumsy teenage jawsten promising years ago that they'd lose their virginity to each other
> 
> in other news: i'm back on my bullshit

They were fourteen. It was a joke.

"Dude, senior year. If I'm still a virgin by then, you gotta do me a solid and help me out." Jawn said, and he didn't really mean it, but Awsten was laughing loud, his head thrown back. It's late August, and they're in Jawn's backyard. The birds startle and flock away from the sound, squawking as they go.

"Sure," Awsten replied after he caught his breath, extending his right hand in Jawn's direction, pinky out. "Promise?" He asked, and Jawn wrapped his finger easily around Awsten's. They shake once and let go, and Awsten's grinning wickedly, his pale cheeks tinted pink. He was never good with sex talk (and honestly, neither was Jawn). 

Jawn can't remember what they did after that. Probably went and bothered Jawn's neighbors, or rode shitty cheap skateboards up and down the potholed street. They were pretty predictable then, dumb and hitting the first terrible wave of testosterone. Awsten's voice squeaked when he talked and Jawn laughed at him, and high school was just a few weeks away.

It'd been almost four years. Awsten brings it up two weeks before graduation.

"Do you remember when we promised to do the whole, uh, virginity thing?" Awsten asks one afternoon as he drove Jawn home after school. Jawn glances at him, a brow raised, before Awsten continues. "Right before freshman year started. Pinky promise, even." He adds, raising his pinky to punctuate his sentence.

Jawn still found himself wondering how Awsten's brain functioned, even after all of these shared years. He said whatever he thought of, whenever he thought of it. Apparently, today's topic is weird promises. "Yeah. I remember." He answers, shrugging. "Why?" 

Awsten pulls up to Jawn's house, grinning a bit. "My parents are out next weekend. Just wondering if you wanted to make good on that promise." He says, casual, like it was nothing. Like he didn't just mention Jawn and him doing _that_. Jawn unbuckles his seatbelt and pauses, peering at Awsten through his hair. 

"You sure?" Jawn prompts, a slow smile spreading across his face. Of course. He should've known Awsten would hold him to this, something that was a passing joke at the time. Awsten was single all throughout high school, and Jawn had a girlfriend for a brief second in sophomore year, but nothing ever came of it other than what Jawn would consider his first heartbreak. He can't even remember if he ever kissed her.

Awsten brushes streaks of blonde hair away from his eyes, and his face is earnest as he says "Buy yourself some condoms and we'll make it a date." His cheeks betray his confident voice, flushing as he speaks. "Saturday. Is that cool?" 

Jawn can already feel the embarrassment of buying condoms somewhere. Of course Awsten would make him go do it (alone, may he add), save himself a little humiliation. Jawn thinks he'd take a lot more than humiliation for Awsten, so he nods his head and says he'll be there, appreciating the way Awsten's face lights up at his response. Jawn gets out of the car then, walks up to his front door, and knows he's in over his head.

They kissed once, in junior year. It was (like many other "no homo" things they did) played off as a joke, but Jawn doesn't think he's stopped thinking about Awsten's mouth since. Logically, he knows he should be concerned about the potential mutual destruction of a decade-long friendship after this happens, but Awsten's always been good about detaching himself emotionally from situations. It'd be fine on his side. As for Jawn's? He really wasn't sure.

Jawn's late on Saturday, because he put off buying condoms as long as humanly possible. The Walgreens lady didn't even look twice as she scanned and bagged them, asked if he had a rewards card. Despite it all, Jawn felt like he was going to die even as he paid and all-but sprinted to his car, locking himself inside. The drive to Awsten's house is excruciatingly slow, and yet too fast. Jawn parks where the family car usually is.

Holding his plastic bag tight, he walks up to the door and knocks. He feels a little nauseated, come to think of it, but Awsten's pulling the door open and Jawn quickly decides he'll be fine. Awsten laughs, short and too loud, and he's already starting to blush. Jawn's got it bad as he steps into the house, gesturing the bag. "See? Now you won't catch anything from me." He says, and Awsten snatches the bag out of his hands, pulling the box out.

"Also means you won't, like. Cum inside me." Awsten comments, reading the box, and Jawn's reeling already. Awsten glances at him, scrunching his nose as he smiles. "I don't think I'm gonna catch anything from your virgin dick anyway, but who knows." He pauses, studying Jawn's face. "Or do you just not like it when I say cum? You should get over that before we do this, I think." 

Jawn blinks at him, almost owlish in nature. "I'm fine with it. Just surprised me." He says, following as Awsten turns to go upstairs. "Where's Gracie?" He asks, a bit concerned. The house seemed almost too quiet, considering the usual state of it when all the Knights were present.

"At a friend's house for the night." Awsten opens his bedroom door, letting Jawn in first. He still locks it behind them. "Sooo...alright. Where to start?" If he's nervous, he doesn't let into it. Jawn doesn't think he's ever been more nervous in his own life, personally, but Awsten was fairly unshakable as is. Jawn doesn't answer, just makes a noncommittal noise until Awsten follows it up with "Kiss me?" and it's an offer he can't refuse.

Jawn steps close, his left hand hesitantly reaching up to cup Awsten's cheek, thumb beneath Awsten's eye. He can feel Awsten's lashes when he blinks, feather-light, and he's so caught up in it that he momentarily forgets his anxiety. Awsten leans in first, but Jawn instigates it, his lips meeting Awsten's somewhere in the middle. Awsten's arms wrap around Jawn, holding him close, and it's a good start. Awsten's lips are soft and warm, desperate for a deeper kiss, and Jawn eventally relents and lets Awsten's tongue slide into his mouth.

Awsten makes a soft sound, his grip on Jawn tightening, holding him close, fingers digging into Jawn's back. Awsten's small against him, delicate in a way Jawn never realized before. He can feel Awsten's bones everywhere, prodding into him as they adjust and shift and try, try to find some sort of rhythm with one another. 

Awsten pulls away first, taking a deep breath. His cheeks are tinted the prettiest shade of rose Jawn has ever seen, and he's smiling, flashing braces-straight teeth. "You -" He says in an exhale, moving his arms up to throw around Jawn's neck, pressing his body flush against Jawn's. "I love you." He giggles when Jawn says it back, kissing Jawn's cheek all the way down to his jaw, nipping at the skin there.

"Fuck, Awsten." Jawn hisses, sliding his hand back to loosely fist into Awsten's hair. He can't bring himself to pull, even as Awsten sucks a haphazard bruise high on Jawn's neck. He wonders briefly if turtlenecks in May are a bit too much, but Awsten's biting and sucking again, his mind turns to TV static. He can't do much but keep his head tilted back, letting Awsten wreak whatever havoc he pleased.

Jawn loses track of time in between the deep kisses and Awsten's teeth on his lower lip and Awsten's hands in his hair. Jawn asks first, if he could take Awsten's shirt off, and Awsten was abruptly shy, his laugh shaking as he stepped back a bit. Jawn takes his own off instead, not wanting to push, and Awsten hummed pleasantly. He looks like he wants to touch but won't ask, just staring before hesitantly pulling his own off over his head.

Making out is different now, skin to skin. Jawn traces his fingers up and down Awsten's sides, feeling his ribs under his thin skin. Awsten twitches under his touch, liable to loud giggling outbursts because _it tickles_ , he'd whine. Awsten's fingers gripped anywhere they could get purchase, bruisingly hard. Jawn doesn't think he'll ever tire of Awsten's tongue in his mouth, inexperienced as they both were, and Awsten's soft skin against his. Still, he has a promise to keep, so he backs Awsten up until Awsten trips, falling backwards onto his mattress.

Awsten bounces a little, a laugh bubbling out of him. The sheets are cold against his too-warm back, and Jawn's catching his breath at the foot of the bed. "I just want to kiss you forever." Awsten comments, voice airy as he drops his head back against his pillow. Jawn huffs a laugh and Awsten squirms, twisting his hips on the bedsheets. He undoes his belt then, tossing it aside, before fighting to kick his jeans off.

Jawn holds his breath. Awsten's hard, and Jawn has never wanted to touch so bad. He leans forward, reaching trembling fingers out before pausing. "Is this - are you okay with this? Can I touch you?" He asks, and he thinks Awsten's going to give himself whiplash with how fast he nods his head. Jawn barely traces the outline of his cock through his underwear, fingertips brushing across the wet mark of precum, and Awsten jerks hard, yelping.

Jawn pulls his hand away, a litany of apologies spilling out before Awsten grabs his wrist and leads him back. Jawn palms him this time, getting accustomed to the feeling of Awsten under him, warm and hard and _god_ , Jawn's jeans are too tight for this. He rubs up and down slowly, and Awsten's gripping his wrist so tight Jawn thinks (not for the first time) that it's going to bruise.

"Oh god, you've got to stop." Awsten mumbles, but his tone sounds like the direct opposite. "It'll be - oh, fuck - so embarrassing if I cum like this." His eyes slip close, hips pushing up into Jawn's hand. "Please, please, fuck, please. Oh, Jawn, you -" He cuts himself off with a whimper as Jawn pulls away. His hips still shift mindlessly, looking for friction and not receiving any.

Jawn's head is fuzzy with arousal as he manages to get his jeans off. He's never heard Awsten like that, breathless and needy; never seen Awsten like that, vulnerable and desperate. It was a lot to handle, and Jawn's lost in thoughts until Awsten speaks up again.

"Are you, uh, comfortable with fingering me? If not, it's cool, I can do it myself." He says, breathless as he rolls to find lube from his nightstand.

Jawn debates it. "You - have you done this?"

Awsten exhale noisily, nodding. "I usually do when I get off. Just, like, one of two fingers. Um." He pauses, gauging Jawn's expression. "It's really no big deal if you don't wanna-"

"Can I watch you?" Jawn asks. His head is reeling at the knowledge of Awsten fingering himself - Jawn can almost picture it, Awsten biting his lip as he strokes himself with one hand and fingers himself with the other, trying to stay quiet. "Please? Just to see what you do." 

Awsten's eyes are wide, gripping the lube in one hand. "Yeah? I'm not really used to putting on a show for anyone, so don't expect it to look pretty." He says, tugging his underwear off. He turns on his side, drawing his top knee up towards his chest. "I don't - I don't usually do it in this position. But you'll be able to see it better." He explains, lubing his middle and ring fingers.

Jawn watches in stunned silence as Awsten arches his spine, reaching his slick hand back to start working his middle finger in. Jawn admires Awsten in the meantime, the soft curve of his back down to his ass, small and cute. His body is twisted, his chest almost pointed towards the ceiling, but his eyes are shut in concentration. He's fairly fast, knows his way around his body, knuckle deep and starting to add his other finger.

He moans quietly at the stretch, pressing back against his own hand. "You freaked out yet? Wanna back out?" He asks, grinning as he peeks at Jawn under his lashes. 

Jawn sidles closer, putting his open palm on the roundest part of Awsten's ass. "Sorta just makes me want to try it more." He answers. It eases his mind slightly, knowing that Awsten's not completely new to all of this. Not like Jawn is.

"Mm, you should try." Awsten comments, sliding his fingers in and out. "Just add one, okay? Like alongside mine? We'll do it together." His voice hitches on every other word, his body spasming under his own hand. He slows as Jawn searches for the lube, is successful in slicking his fingers, but freezes. "Hey, it's not scary or anything. You can do it." Awsten encourages softly, looking up at Jawn from his place on the bed.

Jawn nods jerkily, tense. "I just don't want to hurt you." He answers, matching tones, and Awsten's little laugh is all he needs to ease his stress. He fits his pointer finger up against Awsten's two, gradually sliding in. Awsten jerks beneath him, squeezing his eyes shut. His brows are drawn together, relaxing after a minute of steady rhythm, and it feels ... different. It's slippery from lube and undeniably tight, starting to stretch from where their fingers are together.

Awsten looks beautiful, eyes closed and lips wet with spit, flushed all over from arousal. Jawn can't help but stare at length, watching Awsten's expressions and listening to his little gasps and moans. "Is it-? Does it feel okay to you?" Jawn asks, just to clarify, relieved by Awsten's responding nod.

Awsten's back is arched hard, trying to take whatever friction he could. "I think I'm ready as I can be." He says after a few more moments, pulling his hand away with a sigh. He rolls onto his back, smiling lazily up at Jawn. "Want me to put the condom on you? That's sexy, right?" He sits up carefully, reaching out to hook Jawn's underwear with his thumbs and yank them down.

Jawn steps out of them, feeling beyond vulnerable now. Awsten's eyes are anywhere but his own, looking Jawn up and down quickly. Jawn still catches the flash in his eyes, excitement without nerves, and wishes he could feel it too.

"Fuck, I wanna suck you off so bad." Awsten breathes, leaning close to Jawn's cock. He opens his mouth, flicking his tongue across the tip to gather precum, before pressing a soft kiss to it. "Next time." He adds wistfully.

Jawn isn't sure how he's able to even stay upright while Awsten does this to him. The words _next time_ swim in his head until Awsten's hands wrap around his cock, easing a condom into him. Awsten's hands are small and soft, making deft work of the latex before he lays back again. Suddenly, everything is a bit more real.

"Did you want me like this? Or should I like....turn around?" Awten asks, a miniscule amount of awkward evident in his voice. Mostly, he just sounds eager.

Jawn doesn't know a better way to phrase _I want you any way you come_ , so he settles on "You're fine here. I just wanna see your face." He says, a little lightheaded as Awsten helpfully hands him the lube. He can see his own hands shaking as he pops the lid, using more than probably necessary, and shifting to get into a decent position. "I'm nervous." He admits out loud, gaging Awsten's reaction.

Awsten nods but smiles. "It's okay. I am, too."

Jawn's not sure if he buys it, not completely. Still, he lines up with Awsten's entrance. "Tell me if it hurts." 

Awsten laughs loud, dropping his head back onto the pillow. "Trust me, you'll know." He takes a deep breath and lets it out audibly, still shaky with laughter. "Go for it." His tone is airy, almost flippant, and all Jawn can do is whatever Awsten tells him to. 

He's too afraid to go fast, easing himself in, hearing Awsten's breath hiccup in his throat. Jawn bites his lip and tries to remind himself to breathe. He doesn't know what to do with his hands, doesn't know what to do with _anytthing_ , really. Awsten's relatively quiet so he takes it as a good sign to go a little deeper, push a little more, see how Awsten responds. It's tight and hot and more slippery than Jawn ever pictured. But, he supposes, in his fantasies he never really considered lube in general.

"Shit." is the first thing Awsten huffs out, his eyelids fluttering open. "It's fine. This is fine. You're fine." He looks at Jawn now, his pupils blown, cheeks every shade of red as Jawn continues, trying to set some sort of extremely slow pace. He fists a hand into Jawn's hair, pulling Jawn down for a sloppy kiss, moaning softly into Jawn's mouth. Jawn catches himself on his elbows, one on each side of Awsten's head. Awsten pulls away with a sigh, followed by a murmured "you should fuck me".

Jawn nods wordlessly, picking up a bit of speed. It's impossible, he thinks, to be able to do this for much longer, because Awsten's too tight and too responsive and too _loud_ , getting worked up. Jawn's kind of surprised he didn't cum the moment he got his dick in Awsten, honestly. Awsten's vocal, squeaking and crying out and making other noises that Jawn shouldn't even be hearing right now; sometimes Jawn's name falls from those pink lips and Jawn's unable to form any coherent thoughts past Awsten's name back at him.

Jawn catches Awsten smiling a few times, flashes of teeth between whines and yelps, and Jawn's just a bit discombobulated. To make Awsten feel anything is a gift, especially something like this, something that makes him say _please_ in that barely-southern accent, something that makes him close those two-toned eyes tight, and Jawn's mostly just grateful that Awsten even allowed him to touch him.

Awsten's hand is wrapped loosely around his own cock, stroking as slow as he can manage. "Jawn, I - soon, soon, I can't do - Jawn -" His voice cracks when he talks, tiny and broken, forcing hard emphasis on Jawn's name. Jawn nods and shakes against him, whispering "soon" right back, and he's secretly a little smug with himself for making it this far, almost outlasting Awsten.

He finishes first, stilling deep inside Awsten, dropping his head forward. It jerks his entire body, and he's barely coherent enough to feel Awsten's cum against his stomach, feel Awsten tremble beneath him, yelping Jawn's name. He pulls out as delicately as he can after he comes to a little more, but Awsten whimpers anyway, reaching out to grab Jawn's shoulders like he's going to lose him.

"Thank you, I love you, I love-" Awsten starts, cut off by Jawn's mouth against his. He holds Jawn close even as they pull away, and Jawn can't even bring himself to mind how sweaty Awsten is. "That was fucking amazing, you were amazing, I - fuck, I love you." Awsten's rambling to fill the silence now, burying his face into Jawn's neck, against the raw skin where he bit earlier.

Jawn's shaken up, disoriented, wrapping his arms tight around Awsten's small frame and squeezing. "I love you too, Aws." He says, barely above a whisper.

They share a long moment together, breathing hard and mumbling quick "I love you"s to one another before Jawn decides sitting in Awsten's cum is just a bit too much and they separate. Awsten's face is red, somewhere between embarrassment and the remains of arousal, and Jawn's sure he's looking about the same way.

"I don't - I'm not sure what people do afterwards." Awsten says with a nervous giggle, looking anywhere but Jawn's face.

"Clean up? I think. And then I'll hold you and kiss you and tell you how beautiful you are." Jawn replies, delighting in Awsten's smile, lighting up his entire face.

"Promise?"

"Promise."

**Author's Note:**

> also I'm working on some geoff/jawn content bc it's a fucking crime that there's only one fic of them,, have yall Seen jawns insta its basically a geoff fanpage 
> 
> rpf tumblr: notwxrriors


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